Weddings are one of the oldest rites of passage. Weddings are a symbol of love, hope, devotion, sacrifice, and the future - not just for the couple, but for your families as well. And with them comes with a lot of expectations. With so many rules and ways of doing things, you can feel pressured to follow these do’s and don'ts in wedding planning. Sometimes these unwritten wedding planning rules are deeply ingrained that we do not realize that they are not to be followed strictly. These certain myths may have shaped your wedding-planning process (for better or for worse). So to help you out and for you to be aware, we’ve listed 10 of the most common wedding planning myths that you may or may not follow for your own wedding.
1. You have to wear a white dress
This is probably one of those myths that you will hear from your parents and older family members when you tell them your wedding plans. While a white dress can certainly make brides stunning and elegant, and is the traditional dress to wear in weddings, there is no reason for you to follow this popular tradition (1,4,5,6). The traditional white dress that we see so often is made popular due to religious reasons, but it’s totally up to you whether you want to wear one or not. Weddings have evolved and changed so much that most weddings have deviated from such traditions. No one will pop up during your wedding ceremony as you walk down the aisle just to tell you that wearing anything other than a white dress is prohibited. Even designers acknowledge the fact that brides want a wide array of color options other than white or ivory. This means that you can find a gown with both style and color that you want. While a lot of people feel like nothing can ‘beat’ the traditional and elegant white dress, it can be matched evenly by something colored, sequinned, tasselled, different style, or even varying lengths. If you want to go for a bold style, you can go with darker colors. If you want to feel sassy and luxurious, why not try a gold and sparkly gown. If you don’t want to deviate from the traditional white dress but still want something different, then think about a colored lining or colored details that go with your dress. Go with what you think and feel is best!
2. Inviting people out of reciprocity and obligation
When creating your guest list for your wedding, you might remember that you were invited by your former co-worker in her wedding, and you might feel obliged to invite her to your wedding. That is absolutely wrong! It can also be very easy to get carried away and add everyone you know into the guest list. Those cousins and friends you haven’t seen in years might find their way into the list and you’ll also wonder if That friend needs to be one of your bridesmaids because you were her bridesmaid a couple of years ago at her wedding. Ask yourself this, do you really want people you haven’t seen or spoken to in years to be in your intimate wedding? And do you really need a lot of bridesmaids?If you want to, then go for it, otherwise you don’t have to!
Your wedding is a very special day to celebrate the love you share with your partner, along with the closest family and friends that you have. This means that you do not need to invite people you consider acquaintances out of obligation. This is your wedding and you are the one who gets to decide who’s part of it.
3. DIY will help you save money
If you want to save money for your wedding day, DIY’s are the first thing that comes to mind right? Nowadays, with Pinterest getting more and more popular everyday, it would seem like DIY is the best road to follow because it’s personalized and seems way cheaper than just buying or hiring a professional. However, this may not necessarily be the case. There is no doubt that DIY projects can add a personal touch to your wedding day. But before you go to Pinterest thinking of saving a lot of money and buying all the items you need for your DIY projects - from creating cocktail hour decors to centerpieces to cake toppers, remember that doing it yourself requires a lot of time, skill, and money. The costs can accumulate quickly and most of the time it can add up to more than it would have been to just buy the actual product that you are eyeing to make. While there is something personal and lovely about crafting your own decor for your wedding day, don’t opt to do it purely to save money. That said, if you enjoy craft and love the thought of making things, go ahead but do it because you want to , not just because you want to save money (4,6). The last thing you want to happen is you staying up late every night just to finish your DIY projects.
4. You have to have the same number of bridesmaids as groomsmen
This is another myth that stemmed from tradition that simply isn’t true. If, by any chance, you and your fiance end up having the same number of bridesmaids and groomsmen then that’s great. But if you don’t, then you shouldn’t have to reduce important people or forcibly add extra bridesmaids or groomsmen from the entourage. If your only worry is your picture looking imbalance, talk to your wedding photographer to think of arrangements that create a cohesive photo.
5. You can’t find a budget-friendly bridal gown
Thanks to the countless tv shows and wedding inspiration websites, it would seem inevitable that you need to spend big bucks when shopping for a wedding dress. This couldn’t be any further from the truth! You will be surprised to know that you can find a ‘perfect' dress that fits your style and budget. The key thing when shopping for your wedding dress (or any wedding item) is being honest with yourself when setting a budget for each item. If you don’t want to spend too much on your wedding dress, put a spending cap on it so you won’t go overboard. Factor in the alterations, accessories, shipping, etc. when setting your budget. Plus, don’t forget about sales! They do exist in the wedding industry. Seasonal and sample sales can definitely help you save money. Check out events of your local bridal boutiques to discover ways to save.
6. You shouldn’t hire a wedding planner because it’s just a luxury
It’s quite common for couples to think that wedding planners aren’t necessary because they think that planners cost more than they’re worth and couples think that they can take up on the whole wedding planning process alone. Sometimes this is true, but most of the time it’s not. While you might decide that you do not want to hire a wedding planner, you still shouldn’t rule out that option.
Contrary to popular beliefs, hiring a wedding planner to take care of organization and contact vendors can actually save you money - not to mention the time saved and the stress taken from you (1,6,7). Wedding planners are professionals who work with leading vendors and can find the best possible deals for you. This is their job, so they know all the ins and outs of planning a big day. Although we do acknowledge that the fees to hire a wedding planner might make it look like they are a luxury, the reality is often very different. You would be surprised how much a wedding planner can help you save time, money, stress, and effort. Not only that, but a wedding planner is also:
- An expert and a mentor that you can confide in
- A wedding planner is someone who will listen to your ideas, support you in creating these ideas and take away some of the burden and stress of planning a wedding
- Someone who will work with you to understand your vision and then deliver it
- Someone who will help you create one of the most memorable experiences of your life.
- Someone who will work tirelessly for you, with your best interests at heart, to ensure that every last detail is carefully considered and flawlessly executed
Think of your wedding planner as a time-saving safety net that you can fall into when you are having a hard time planning your wedding. They have all the time and experience that you need to make sure that your wedding is everything you hoped it would be. They will save you a lot of the hassle, stress, and organizational headaches and will help come up with great ideas and vendors that you will surely love. You’ll still get all the best bits of wedding planning without any of the worry and we’ll give you a day that you’ll remember forever. If you aren’t still convinced that you should hire someone to help you out during the wedding planning process, why not hire a day-of-wedding planner to help you on the day of your wedding for a quarter of the price.
7. You can get your friends to help you instead of hiring professionals
This is very prominent on couples who want to save money. Yes, your friend might be a good photographer and his Instagram feed might look great, but that doesn’t translate much into wedding photography. Although there is nothing wrong with getting crowd-sourced wedding photos and the like, make no mistake about this - you just won’t get the same results from someone who does this for their livelihood. Plus, you wouldn’t want your friends or relatives missing out on the ceremony, reception, or any big moment because they’re busy setting up or working on your wedding day (1,3).
8. You’ll spend too much money
Most of the previous myths are mostly about saving money or having to do with spending too much money, but let’s debunk this myth one more time. You can still plan the wedding of your dreams without emptying your bank accounts. From (realistic) DIYs, hiring wedding professionals, not buying dresses and suits for your entourage, reception, and everything else in between, there are countless ways to save money while also ensuring that you and your guests will have a memorable day that still fits your budget.
9. Your wedding day must follow a traditional format
Most of us have been to traditional weddings. Weddings with a ceremony held in a church followed by a ballroom reception. Having a blast drinking wine or champagne and dancing with the newlywed couple. Although you do not have to follow the same tradition for your wedding. Think and envision the type of wedding celebration that you want. It doesn’t matter if it’s a formal and full-blown celebration, a romantic brunch, a casual backyard wedding, or an elopement into the wild - you should follow what you both want. Decide what traditions you want to follow and omit, and come up with your own unique traditions (2,3,6).
10. Getting married will send you broke
Weddings Can be expensive (if you choose that it would be), but it doesn’t mean that you should take a huge loan just to pay for it. You don’t need big bucks just to celebrate something very intimate. Think and set your priorities so will focus your resources on these things. This way you will be able to host a lavish celebration that fits in your wedding budget. Your venue, guest list and wedding date make three major points where you can save, and then you can splurge on things that are important to you such as photography, food, flowers and your wedding dress.